I love this kind of intelligent writing about popular culture. Sean Thomas-Brietfeld discusses “A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila” and how the show missed out on the opportunity to radically redefine the way we see relationships. A few choice quotes:
Tila Tequila’s “A Shot at Love” ultimately squandered the possibility of offering a radically different vision of sex and sexuality. Instead, it reinforced the racism embedded in our society’s hierarchy of desire; where Asian women are sexually desirable but Asian men are invisible, and interracial relationships must always involve a White partner. And the show’s treatment of female bisexuality largely pandered to the voyeuristic fascination of straight dudes, featuring Tila making out with other bikini-clad women. Finally, Tila’s ultimate choice of a dude reinforced the reassuring idea for straights and paranoid fear for queers that bisexuals ultimately choose heterosexual partnerships.
Polyamory, or consensual non-monogamy, recognizes a basic fact of human sexuality: the eye will wander. If open relationships were a socially acceptable option, we’d think very differently about “adultery” and we’d probably craft very different romantic relationships…As with so many other things we obsess over (gender, race, sexual orientation, etc.), adultery is a social construct and it varies from culture to culture.
Consensual non-monogamy would make it possible for partners to honestly tell each other when they are attracted to other people and even go out on dates with other people with the full knowledge and blessing of their primary partner. It would be possible for a couple to welcome another person (or persons) into their relationship (and bedroom). It would certainly give new meaning to the idea of a “blended family” (Heather could have three mommies instead of just two). Obviously, these possibilities exist outside of the legal frame of marriage. But, as the 250 authors, activists, intellectuals and celebrities (gay and straight) who wrote the Beyond Same-Sex Marriage statement noted, “marriage is not the only worthy form of family or relationship, and it should not be legally and economically privileged above all others.”
[via Racialicious]
